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Eat your Food
Being a parent I can’t even begin to tell you how many times this line has been uttered from my mouth. The words are classic, the disagreement has been going on for
centuries I am sure. You must Eat your Food!
You spend a hard day working, and then you create by all means what you think is a wonderful meal, only to have it turned down and pushed away by your child. I don’t want to eat this, I won’t eat this, you can’t make me eat this. What is a parent supposed to do?
My husband recalls that he wasn’t allowed to leave the table until he finished his meal, what ever it may have been, even when it was the dreaded Brussels sprout sitting on his plate . I think a lot of us can agree with, and remember this being the standard. Is it still the way to go today?I know a mom (shall remain nameless,) who once made her child four separate meals on one night, after said child had refused to eat any of them. What do you do? How do you stress to your child that food is important, that wasting isn’t something anyone should be doing?
How do you stress to anyone the importance of food when they have never went without? Never skipped a meal not because they weren’t hungry but because there wasn’t any food to eat, because they didn’t have the resources or the money? How can you get your child to eat their meal without causing you to bargain, and getting them to understand that wastefulness just isn’t acceptable?
Here is what I do with my son, because this has happened to me, I am willing to bet to every parent. I have remade a meal on occasion for him, if only because I didn’t want to hear the debate, but that is few and far between. I don’t make my son sit at the table until his food is done. Instead I make our family a meal, and he is required to eat what I make, but if he doesn’t want to eat it, then he goes without. My son missing a meal isn’t going to hurt him, he isn’t going to starve. I let him know that he gets to eat what is on his plate and he can’t have anything else that evening unless he finishes an acceptable amount of his food.
He doesn’t have to stay at the table, he can be excused when ever he pleases after we all have finished eating, but his plate stays, and the rule stays. No after dinner dessert, no little bit of this or that to snack on, not until he finishes his meal. I try to slip in a little teaching about the value of the food on his plate, that their are people out there that don’t get this much to eat in a week. Even though he is three and it may go over his head a bit, I still stop to explain this, because some day hopefully he will understand.
You have to be strong, but fair when it comes to this. Remember how you felt when being forced to sit there at the table? The truth is most of the time my son will pout, but then he will turn around and play a little and then go eat some more of his dinner. On occasion I will make him a separate meal, most of the time this is when I know he won’t be eating the dinner I am making.
The whole point to this article is because I am curious. What do you other parents out there do? How do you handle this situation?
Filed under: Parenting, Rants & Raves, bakedblog, children, family, life
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I always insisted they take one bite of the food they professed to dislike. If they still insisted they didn’t like it, they didn’t have to eat any more of it until the next meal it was served at, but the one bite rule persisted for each meal no matter how many times noses were turned up at broccoli, or brussels sprouts.
My boys are grown and with kids of their own. They use my one bite rule as well because it works.
The child doesn’t get a guilt trip about wasted food or starving people in third world countries (those good lessons that don’t need guilt built into them), but gets exposed to tastes he/she has never been exposed to before and eventually they learn to enjoy the foods they previously spurned.
I will never forget my long aversion to minced meat pie simply because of the name — I thought erroneously that it had minced meat (not specified what kind of meat) in it and I didn’t want it. I could never understand why all the adults fell on Mama’s minced meat pie like ravening wolves. Once I became a cook and realized it was NUTMEATS, I too fell in love with minced meat pie, but regret strongly all the years I missed out. I was determined that my children would never have the chance to make that same error based on how a food looked, it’s name or some other misconception. By having them take ONE BITE, they get the chance to overcome prejudices easily and without much stress on anyone’s part.
Margaret
Sounds like we have a similar policy. I also require my daughter to eat a certain amount of whatever I cook or she choose to go without - her choice. However, I do not cook her a separate meal.
Now there have been times when she’s tried something a few times and I know she doesn’t like it so I plan alternatives for her, but it’s done with my meal planning an an option for everyone.
Good for you — you’ll be happy you stuck to your guns. Kids will say they don’t like something when they really mean they don’t want it and many parents give up on that food and don’t offer it again.
That seems like a good way to handle it. I like your suggestions. I don’t remember ever being forced to finish my meals, probably because I would eat anything. And I still eat anything!
When I have kids, I will encourage them to try new foods. And I will try to make as many different meals as possible. I know my brother became quite a picky eater (and still is). He only eats food that’s prepared the way Mom makes it.
[…] Eat your Food […]
My son is so hard to feed! He’s a typical 2.7 year old toddler who always wants to assert his will. I do worry, though, because he’s much leaner than I would have liked. I’ll try your tips, might work for him. Thanks!
[…] I was blog hopping and came across Baked Blog and her post, Eat Your Food. I could hear a mental groan. A big one. It’s one of those scenes I hope won’t be a […]
I do the same as you. This is the dinner we’re having, and you can eat it or not. We do make her stay at the table with us for a while, but she is not required to eat.
I also try to remember that young children typically consume most of their calories before noon and that, perhaps, this is why said child is not interested in dinner.